i'd stop the world...

and melt with him.

Super old school.... my thoughts on 2007

Here's what 2007 has taught me...

My parents were right

Just because we are blood related doesn't mean we are family

Giving will ALWAYS top recieving

A good laugh with good friends is nothing to take for granted

Don't complain about the heat, remember how cold, cold is.

Red meat can take up to 14 days for your body to process

Time is the only way to heal a broken heart

Friendships take work

Britney Spears shouldn't be allowed to drive

Don't take for granted what could be gone tomorrow

Never miss an I Love You

Drinking TOO much is easy to achieve

You won't find happiness until you create happiness

Don't rely on someone else to make you, you

Things will change, people will come and go, Let it!

It's ok to double check the locks :)

Hard work pays off at some point

You're never too old to wish on a shooting star

Life is short, make your time on earth count for something

Music will never hurt

Free Range Chickens DO NOT MEAN THEY ROAM FREE

Don't look for what is right in front of you

Hybrid cars can catch on fire QUICKLY

The song " I saw Mommy kissing santa" is not about a Mother being a whore

Duraflame logs are more eco friendly than real wood

It's ok to listen to your heart, as long as you tap into your brain once in awhile

You don't need assistance when it comes to breaking a habit

The song about Seattle's Latte Land is possibly the worst holiday song ever.

Your dirty little secret's can't stay secret's forever.

Honesty, though it may suck, is always the better choice

There is such a thing as too many pillows

It's ok to put myself first sometimes

Don't take your life for granted

Celebrate your birthday instead of dreading getting older

It's hard to fake love

Don't talk shit to anyone in my family, about our family

Don't go too fast, when you crash, it can turn your world around

Carmex never heals chapped lips

It's never too late to find faith

I don't need to attend church every Sunday to know God, He's with me all the time.

My Grandma is someone I could never live without

I learned how to cry happy tears

I'm over the people that treat my family as outcasts

Driving an SUV is insane with the gas prices

I'm allergic to chocolate

I'm spoiled

I'm a lot stronger than I give myself credit for

Love isn't always on time

The Used will never go out of style

If you don't get your mail after a week, they return it

People are never how you expect them to be

It's ok to love those that don't love you back

Second chances are rarely deserved

Take care of your hearing, it's gonna go fast!

Taste of Chaos is only watchable when The Used perform

The only person that deserves your faith is God

Don't tear off more than you can chew

The greatest friends know you, even when you don't know yourself

The good years are nothing to complain about

There is no such thing as time travel, so quit worrying about the past

Global Warming is nothing to fuck around with

Washington D.C. has nicer people than Washington State

It's easy to forgive, it's impossible to forget

Don't judge unless you are prepared to be judged

Volunteering is easily the most rewarding thing you can do

Be grateful!

I prefer See's Candy over Boehms chocolates

I learned not to worry about the current year

There's always next year....

rude boy

oh the beauty in dating. So many dates, so little dedication to documenting all of the details. For roughly 2 months now I have been what someone would call a "player." I have been doing some sort of juggling act with a handful of different guys. All of which are super fun to hang out with, and none of which are relationship material.

What. The. Heck.

My week and weekend are seriously consumed with boys. I have a different date each week. I'm juggling text messages and phone calls and facebook messages and instant messages and coffee dates and happy hour dates and meet and greets with co-workers and TRIPS TO MAUI? Yes, someone the other week invited me to Maui with him and his friends for Halloween. Although I was completely game for this idea, many friends brought me back to reality and explained to me why I couldn't go. Boo. I've had good dates, bad dates, fun dates, boring dates, breakfast dates, sleepover dates, dates where I am asked out by someone else while my date is in the bathroom......you name it.

Bottom line: I'm exhausted.

I don't want to DATE anymore. I don't want temporary people in my life filling my head and heart with unsatisfying butterflies. I realize this is how life works, but I'm bored.

Check Please!

Congratulations!!

So today while eating my lunch it dawned on me that LUNCHABLES have been around since I was in elementary school. How awesome is that? I'm 26 on the verge of 27, do the math, that's a LONG time! They haven't changed much, either. Same crackers (although now with a serving of whole grain), same turkey (although now served with only 100% turkey breast), same sliced cheese (they didn't have anything to say on the cheese), and Capri Sun (100% juice). I couldn't believe how something so simple as an Oscar Meyer Lunchable could survive and still be favored for that many years. I can't think of anything else that's been around that long. Well, I guess there's TV, Highlighters, Scissors, Water, Coke, but nothing is as cool as the LUNCHABLE! You might be asking yourself "is it as good as it was back then?" and my unbiased thoughts are IT'S BETTER! I now get to pick out which ones I want, use my own money and eat at whatever time of day I want. So much better than when I was 7 :)

10.05.10

It's October which means the seasons are supposed to change.... right? I find it hilarious how the weather today is better than most of the days in August and September, I'd say 85%. RIDICULOUS. Just when I'm starting to prepare myself for the cold and wicked months ahead, Mother Nature plays tricks on me and teases me with SUNSHINE. I'm already starting to miss Chelan and that yummy feeling of Summer, don't throw Sunshine at me and expect me to remain calm, clothed and inside!

I mean I'm so confused when I have to get dressed in the morning. It's cold, so I immediately want to put on some irritating wool sweater and ugg boots, but then I see sunshine and I immediately throw on flip flops. My hair is doing some weird static cling routine since the air is so dry (what does that have to do with this post?). I see the leaves changing, I can feel my birthday approaching and yet I feel like yummy summer is trying to make it up to me (see post below).

Oh well, I guess I'll just continue to be weather challenged and mix winter items with my favorite flip flops (i.e. plaid long sleeve button up shirt and Old Navy flip flops)

Summer Girl

I'm a Summer Girl. Everything about me represents Summer. I love the sunkissed highlites my hair gets, the tan lines on my toes from my toe rings, the freckles on my shoulders that I obsess over like a complete weirdo. SUMMER. I adore it. I wish Summer wasn't a season, more or less a lifestyle. Like I wish I could just LIVE Summer all year long. Everything awesome that comes with Summer, would just be a natural part of my life. Do you think I could obtain that by moving to a sunny location? Would I miss the seasons? I hardly think I'd even notice. I really wouldn't mind a palm tree Christmas. I'd be so blubbering happy with living SUMMER that it wouldn't even dawn on me that my Christmas tree was mostly made of trunk. I don't even like Christmas trees, they shed, it's weird.

I think that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to LIVE SUMMER. The feeling that most people get when they fall in love.... well..... that's the way I feel almost EVERYDAY during the Sunny Summertime months. Who wouldn't want to experience that 24/7? Or I guess a less drastic fix would be to just fall in love? Ha Ha....I think I'll pass, book a plane ticket and find myself some SUMMER.

crazy town

I love my house in Chelan. I love spending quality time with the people that matter the most in my life. I love how free I feel the minute I drive through Snoqualmie Pass and start to see a change of scenery. The relaxed lifestyle of a small town is so refreshing, so personal and quaint yet so dangerous. After having a house in this small town for almost 13 years, I have definitely created some incredible and not so incredible memories. Some worth mentioning and some that I would pay $1 million to forget. This Summer I feel like I created some of those memories that will last a lifetime. The type that have a soundtrack, similar to the Summer of '98. The Summer of '98 can instantly be recalled to memory within seconds of hearing Santana, Chicago or Brandy "The Boy is Mine." Needless to say, it was a Summer that I'll never forget. Epic failures and even more incredible gains, it's safe to say that I've definitely changed.

Summer of 2010 Soundtrack:

David Nail - Turning Home
Lil Jon feat LMFAO - Get Outta Your Mind
Taio Cruz - Dynamite
Lady Antebellum - American Honey
Tim McGraw - Still
TechN9ne - I'm a Player
Zac Brown Band - Free (with violin intro)
Sugarland - Stuck Like Glue
The Who - Love Reign O'er Me
Oasis - Wonderwall
Usher - Oh My Gosh
Brandon Flowers - Crossfire
Travie McCoy feat Bruno Mars - Billionaire
Eminem feat Rihanna - Love The Way You Lie
Eminem feat Lil Wayne - No Love
Rihanna - Wait is Over
Josh Turner - All Over Me
Lady Antebellum - Our Kind Of Love
Carrie Underwood - Undo It
Reba McEntire - On The Radio
Darius Rucker - Come Back Song
Zac Brown Band feat Alan Jackson - As She's Walking Away
Trace Adkins - This Ain't No Love Song
Paper Tongues - Ride to California
3OH3 - Touchin On My
Bruno Mars feat Cee-Lo - The Other Side
Kenny Chesney - The Boys of Fall
Kenny Chesney - Anything But Mine
Tim McGraw - All We Ever Find
Taylor Swift feat Colbie Caillat - Breathe
The Band Perry - If I Die Young
Lee Brice - Love Like Crazy
Jason Aldean - Don't Give Up On Me

the golden rule: needs to be re-evaluated

"Treat others the way you would like to be treated..."

I think, maybe, there's room for adjustment with this rule. Like, say, for example, I treat someone the way I would like them to treat me, yet they treat me however they want (which isn't good). Does that mean I'm going against the golden rule if I decide to be a bitch and cut them out of my life? It's a fine line, I'm not sure I want to cross it, but I definitely don't want to be treated with disrespect.

something sexy about the rain...

It's August. A U G U S T ! Typically the hottest month of the year, I'm usually lounging by my pool every night after work just to avoid my hotter than Haiti condo...... Not this year. This year is completely F'd.

This was taken on SATURDAY AFTERNOON. Instead of tan toes and freckled shoulders, I'm looking at wool socks and knee length UGGS!!!!

Mr. Sunshine, I promise to be a good girl if you promise to come out and fulfill your duties in life.

summer.of.love

Everyone has a time of year that reminds them of LOVE. For most its the holiday season, presents, mistletoe, hot chocolate, valentines day hearts, etc. For me, it's always been Summer. The minute the sun starts to shine in this Evergreen, 24/7 car wash state, I immediately feel like I could fall in love. I love, LOVE. I'm obsessed with tan fingers intertwined and freckled noses meeting with a kiss. As soon as I can smell Summer, I am in love.

This Summer, I don't see myself falling in LOVE, maybe LUST? It's not as beautiful, and it usually dissolves before it truly evolves into anything of importance, but it's still fun. All around me I am witnessing the act of falling in love, or being in love. I don't think there is anything more beautiful in life than the act of falling in love. It's impossible not to admire it and be inspired by it.

Burned out, Bruised and Beaten

"and you said I know that this will hurt, but if I don't break your heart, then things will just get worse. if the burden seems too much to bear, remember the end will justify the pain it took to get us there.."


I'm a hopeless romantic, I'm also guilty of over analyzing everything in my life. Two things that seriously cannot go hand in hand and end with success. I have the ability to talk myself into and out of the most ridiculous situations just by over analyzing something. A conversation, a picture posted on facebook, lack of text messaging (yes, it means something when you don't text). You name it, and I will obsess over it until I am blue in the face, or red, seeing as how this stress leads to hours on the treadmill. Regardless, my hopeless romantic bone in my body allows me to fall ever so easily for anyone that crosses my path; granted I am attracted to them and have chemistry. (I'm not talking about a random person who catches my eye, not that crazy!) I am passionate, and with this passion, I put my heart out there for all to see and eventually hurt. I literally have no idea how and why I do this. I don't know how to change it, I don't even know how to control it. I'm burned out, bruised and beaten and I can't seem to do a damn thing to make it stop.

this time baby, i'll be bulletproof

Fourth of July came and went.. had an amazing extended weekend in Chelan with family and friends. I definitely created some memories that will last a lifetime. I re-connected with old friends and made new, I laughed until I cried and sang obnoxious karaoke (sober). I kayaked and swam in polar bear temperature water. I took someone "to the grass" which is something I will forever laugh at. We watched the fireworks from a different location this year! Last year I had the pleasure of watching the fireworks show on a boat in the middle of the lake. This year we drove around the lake to my Aunt and Uncle's second property to watch them from their beach. It was an overall perfect holiday weekend. I hope the rest of the summer plays out to be as exciting as this weekend.

(left to right) Sammie, Sara, ME, Ashley
(front) MiaBella

Laugh

Kitty

i love it when i see your...

FACE DROP.
I told you not to leave me alone
and now that I got my own
I see your face drop
I told you not to count me out
'cause you always try to fill me with doubt
sayin that I look better if I was thinner
don't you know you shoulda loved me for my inner
when I left you, yo, I came out a winner....

and now I see your FACE DROP!

Honestly? Like I don't find it odd that you haven't talked with me in months, and all of a sudden after putting more recent pictures on my facebook, you call me? Like, what, I've been sitting waiting for you to contact me? WTF?!

I'm still the same girl, douche bag...

is love...alive?

I've been so lazy lately. Not in life, but with blogging. Instead of actually posting anything with substance, I just post pictures. Like that really sums up what's going on around me...?! So, what IS going on around me? Relationships are ending. Hearts are breaking and growing stronger with time. Backbones are forming. Minds are coming to anticipated conclusions. Fists are being thrown and making contact with faces (its ok to smile). Hearts are finally coming to a mutual agreement with gut feelings.

douche bags are finally finding the door, and Mia is locking it behind him and throwing away the key.

from sunrise to sunset

i hope you had the time of your life...

6.11.10. So Proud. It's YOUR day! xo

crumbling

"....And in between the moon and you
The angels get a better view
Of the crumbling difference between wrong and right.
I walk in the air between the rain
Through myself and back again
Where? I don't know

And she walks along the edge of where the ocean meets the land
Just like she's walking on a wire in the circus
She parks her car outside of my house
Takes her clothes off
Says she's close to understanding Jesus
She knows she's more than just a little misunderstood
She has trouble acting normal when she's nervous
Round here we're carving out our names
Round here we all look the same
Round here we talk just like lions
But we sacrifice like lambs
Round here she's slipping through my hands

She says "it's only in my head"
She says "Shhh I know it's only in my head"
But the girl on the car in the parking lot
Says "Man you should try to take a shot
Can't you see my walls are crumbling?"
Then she looks up at the building
Says she's thinking of jumping
She says she's tired of life
She must be tired of something
Round here she's always on my mind
Round here hey man got lots of time
Round here we're never sent to bed early
and nobody makes us wait
Round here we stay up very, very, very, very late
I can't see nothing.. nothing round here
Will you catch me if I'm falling
Will you catch me if I'm falling down on you

I said I'm under the gun around here
I'm innocent I'm under the gun around here
And I can't see nothing
Nothing round here....."

bits and pieces of Counting Crows "Round Here" for some odd reason... I relate to this song today.

Gravity

I had one of the best weekends of my life this past weekend. I was able to spend quality time with some awesome people. I was quickly reminded of how life is supposed to be lived.... I feel like I lost that at some point this past year. I also had an epiphany.. after evaluating my current self I realized how incredibly stupid someone must be to choose to not be apart of my life. I know that sounds incredibly self centered, and it really is. But I finally see how amazing I am, and how stupid someone else is. Sure I've said it to myself hundreds of times before, I've even gone as far as repeating it to others... but I always fell back into his gravity. But now, today, after recognizing how much I've changed both physically and emotionally I know it's true. To pass up the opportunity to be an important person in my life clearly shows your lack of intelligence.

I also realize that no matter how much I change, he will never be what I imagine him to be. It's not ME that needs to change, its not him either. I just cannot make him feel for me the way I always wanted/needed him to. That's ok, because in that realization, I see the beauty in letting go. Live and Let Die. I'm ready to let this "friendship-bullshit" fall apart, so that something wonderful and with purpose can fall together.

I know I claim to recognize this info every time I get frustrated with him, but this weekend after zero communication from my part and his, it clicked. Talking yesterday and today made me realize that there is nothing there, nothing will ever be there.

Something always brings me back to you
It never takes too long.
No matter what I say or do I'll still feel you here 'til the moment I'm gone

You hold me without touch.
You keep me without chains

I live here on my knees as I try to make you see
That you're everything I think I need here on the ground.
But you're neither friend nor foe though I can't seem to let you go.
The one thing that I still know is that you're keeping me down

(bits and pieces of Sara Bareilles "Gravity")

"If opportunity doesn't knock... build a door." -Milton Berle

we didn't start the fire

I'm playing with fire again

fully aware that I will get burned

and yet I continue to strike a match and watch it burn

completely ignorant to the pain

and yet completely satisfied and content

I know how this will end....